We are bombarded by pro-health messages.
Exercise is good for you.
Not only is exercise good, it also makes sense to manage your weight. If you are sedentary and you gain too much weight you can damage your health. Eat excessive sugar and damage your health. On the other hand, lose too much weight and you will eventually have health problems. Life-long learning improves your wellbeing. Life-long learning keeps you mentally sharp. Above all, staying active is good for your health. Drink water. Water is good for your health. Eat healthy, exercise, stimulate your brain. It goes on and on.
Put yourself on any pro-health regimen and you will probably feel, look, and act better.
Will you be happier? This is an open question, but most people would say, Yes.
Reading the New York Times, I’ve noticed a flood of articles on the benefits of exercise. Evidence that exercise improves brain health, maintains physical health, promotes mental health, helps with the aging process, diminishes depression and on and on.
But, exercising is not easy. I can testify to this. Life-long exercise is even more difficult. To be sure, a lifetime commitment to any systematic pro-health behavior is hard to do. Let’s not kid ourselves about it.
Sure, exercise promoters say it’s easy, or at least seems easy. A 7-minute daily exercise routine. What could be so hard about this?
Exercising only 7-minutes a day appears easy, but the fact is: It is NOT easy to exercise 7-minutes a day for the rest of your life.
FACT: A positive behavior routine is difficult. It’s difficult to start, difficult to maintain, and once you are doing it you are prone to relapse.
Why?
Because, like I said, positive routines, in general, are difficult to start and sustain.
Why?
This second “Why?” is a BIG question. What makes a health behavior difficult to initiate and persist in doing?
The answer to this question requires some background on yourself. Who you are and who you are NOT?
First, you are a human being, NOT a robot. This raises the question about what differentiates a human being from a robot. One is that human beings possess experiences and a point of view within a complex and unique intrapsychic world. Human beings are more than just an anatomically designed animal with a biologically multi-faceted brain. Human beings get tired, robots do not. Human beings get discouraged, robots do not. Human beings sometimes don’t feel like exercising, robots could care less as long as it is in their algorithmic subroutine. Robots don’t have a choice, human beings choose. This point (capacity to choose or “free will”), in some philosophical circles is up for debate. But, suffice it to say for our purposes here that most people perceive that they have the ability to choose. In a phenomenological sense, we feel empowered to choose. What we decide to choose is important in this blog entry.
The basic premise of this entry. What are the implications of human choice and, especially, following through on that choice?
I could fill endless entries with speculation around the topic of human choice and follow through. To choose to engage in exercise, to really choose to do this behavior, and to keep it up, say, for a lifetime, is a huge commitment. Sure, it’s more than likely good for you, but that is another issue. The main issue is whether or not exercise is worth choosing to do. The issue of what it takes to choose and follow through with a “large-magnitude” choice is worth exploring.
Some people might say, “I simply don’t think about it, I just decide and start doing it, and if I feel good I keep doing it.” This approach sounds like the perennial “New Year’s Resolution.”
What is a “New Year’s Resolution” anyway?
The Dictionary defines a New Year’s Resolution as: A promise that you make to yourself (a promise is a choice with follow through) to start doing something good or stop doing something bad on the first day of the year.
How many people follow through with a “New Year’s Resolution?”
In a 2022 Survey conducted by Statista, around 39% of American adult respondents made a New Year’s resolution.
Nearly 80% of these people admitted to abandoning their New Year’s resolution by February 2022 (one month later).
Below is a pictorial description of the kinds of things that people promise to do (or not do) as part of a New Year’s Resolution.
Why do people make a one-time commitment to change (or start a behavior), but fail keep it up in the long run?
This is a good question. Unfortunately, a general answer to this question would be difficult to identify. A component answer is perhaps that “people need help to keep up a new behavior for a lifetime.” By “help” I mean, people need: 1. A plan, 2. structure, 3. affirmation or support from others.
Below is a list of strategies researchers at the University of Alabama say helps a person follow through, for a lifetime, with a New Year’s Resolution:
Start with specific micro-goals: Goal-setting and resolutions are typically more of a marathon than a sprint.
Set resolutions for the right reasons: It’s important to make resolutions that have a deep importance to you.
Document your progress: It’s hard to stay focused on goals if you don’t see yourself making progress. Writing down your successes and challenges.
Practice patience and forgiveness: Through the ups and downs, practice patience and forgiveness with yourself, acknowledging that no one is perfect and that you are on the right path.
Schedule in time to achieve goals: Blocking off an hour each day to exercise.
Embrace the buddy system: Having a buddy alongside to support you.
Slow down and meditate: Meditation is a great tool for slowing down the mind and bringing your focus to just one thing, such as the resolution you’re striving to achieve.
Reward yourself for achievements: Rewards provide tangible proof that your resolution plan is working.
Ask others to keep you accountable: People who stick to their resolutions ask others to keep them accountable.
I’m not suggesting you apply all these strategies or even any of them. I’m only presenting this list because it underscores just how hard it is to follow through on a single life-time choice to, say, exercise. This same list would apply to stopping alcohol use, reducing stress at work, and on and on.
I have, personally, been engaging in my own experiment with the life-time choice issue. Below is a diary I have been keeping in my effort to walk 30 minutes a day for the rest of my life.
Day one: “This should be doable, it’s only 30 minutes. So here goes. Walked that day.
Day two: “I think I can do this, but it is harder than I thought it would be.” Walked that day.
Day three: “I’ve started this and it’s hot outside. Need to walk only in early morning or late at night.” Walked that day.
Day four: “I’ve really got to walk either in the early morning or late at night” Walked that day.
Day five: “It doesn’t matter whether I walk in the morning, middle of day, or at night, I sweat through all my clothes. I’ve got to bring several t-shirts to my office.” Walked that day
…..
Day 12: “Maybe I should give myself one day off, but then again, I’m only walking 30 minutes, this is starting to turn into a slight hassle.” Walked that day.
Day 13: “I’m still thinking about taking a day off, once a week.” Walked that day.
Day 14: “What if I’m sick, Do I have permission to stop walking?” Walked that day.
Day 15 “I’ve started listening to a podcast, this helps.” Walked that day.
…
Day 30 “Spouse has decided she wants to walk with me.” Good and Bad. Good, I like the company, Bad, when I walk needs to be coordinated with her.” Walked that Day.
Day 31 “Got in trouble with spouse today because I walked and didn’t tell her. I guess she wants me to call her every time I decide to walk. Fair enough. Walked that Day.
…
Day 45 “Walked in the middle of the day." It must have been 98 degrees. Covered with sweat. This was miserable.” Walked that day.
Day 46 “I still hate walking. I feel like I’m into this and I can’t stop or I’ll feel like I blew the whole effort.” Walked that day.
…
Day 60 “This is getting routine, but it’s still hard.” Walked that day.
Day 61 “I think I feel emotionally better, but I haven’t been keeping track so who knows?” Walked that day.
…
Day 75 “ Maybe I should try and walk farther, but if I do, I’ll raise the bar and I’ll never keep this up.” Walked that day.
Day 75 “It started to rain while we were walking. I guess walking is walking rain or shine.” Walked that day
…
Day 85 “I still hate walking every day, but I guess it’s good for you.” Walked that day
Day 86 “Planned to walk this eve. started raining, kept raining, too bad” Did NOT Walk Today.
Day 87 “Good day for walking.” Walked today.
…
CONTINUING
This is only a small snapshot of my daily log. I kept the log simple because if I want do it for a lifetime, it can be difficult. But, I discovered so far from my diary that I actually DIDN’T walk every day (not a great resolution - perhaps, “Walk 30 minutes mostly every day.” Why? Things got in the way [WEATHER] and so on. But, I’m currently 95% adherent. I conclude that doing something “required every day” like walking every-single-day rain or shine is probably impossible. But, to keep it up regularly (or mostly) MIGHT be doable. We will see how my experiment goes.
What do you observe in my daily log?
You might think walking 30-minutes a day is no big deal. But, believe me. It is hard to do. When something, anything, is inserted into an integral part of your day, every day, at such a high level, your entire life, it takes on substantial emotional features. At times, you love it, glad you are doing it, then you hate it, feel like it’s trapping you, feel like it’s not worth it, feel like you can put it off till later. You aren’t sure if it’s worth it, but at the same time, you are proud that you are doing it, and on and on. I roughly walk the same route every day. At first, I started marking my time with a stopwatch, but soon, I didn’t need the watch anymore. I know now, by feel, how far one must walk (at least at my pace) to walk for 30-minutes. Soon, I found that no matter what I do or who I walk with it gets boring and there are times I’m ready for it to be over before it starts. A treadmill might be useful for some people if conditions are bad for walking, but it is not a panacea. I don’t have a treadmill and I don’t plan to depend on a treadmill even if it has good technology to keep me entertained while I am walking on it. I’m certainly not walking in a gym. It seems to me that a gym is just a petri dish for COVID right now.
It seems to me that walking is like a long-term marriage. If it starts out OK, and if there are no major issues or you don’t do anything to really screw it up (like cheat on your partner), then it can probably go for a lifetime. But, then YOU start changing, your emotions get involved, the other person starts changing. The other person’s emotions get involved. You start getting discouraged, disappointed, then angry and frustrated, sometimes with yourself and sometimes with your partner. Things like sex start to wane in interest (after you have sex with the same person over 200 times, it just doesn’t have the allure it once had. Then, you make a few mistakes, your partner makes a mistake or two. There needs to be a way to deal with these emotional and developmental and behavioral shifts in the relationship if you want it to last. You must really, really want the marriage to last if it is going to last. Therefore, there needs to be a way to manage your emotional and developmental shifts and coordinate these shifts with your partner if you want to stay married to the same person for a lifetime. Nothing a person does systematically for a lifetime is easy and this goes for marriage. I’ve been married just over 40 years to the same person and I speak with some degree of personal knowledge about this process. My spouse recently said to me,
“Bob, there is this marriage improvement class that I saw and considered taking, but then I decided not to take the class because, you know, our marriage is what it is. We’ve been married too long, been through too much to make it any better or for that matter for it to get any worse, so there’s no reason to waste my time taking a marriage improvement course. I think I’ll take the financial planning course instead.”
I’ll let you, the reader, decide whether you think this is a good or bad appraisal of my marital status. However, the point here is that it takes a lot of time and effort to make a life-time choice and then follow through with that choice for a lifespan.
Do you already have a lifetime commitment to something?
If so, What is it?
Lifetime commitments are more doable when they are connected to something or someone you value. For example, it’s easy to make a lifetime commitment to attend church every Sunday if:
You are a true believer in your faith
Your extended family also attends the same Church
The Church building is in your neighborhood
You attended Church every Sunday since you were a child.
It is a belief “tradition” in your longstanding family pedigree
I’m not personally a Church attender, but what I’m saying here is that when something is tightly connected to your world view, your values, your belief system, the greater the likelihood it could become a lifetime commitment. People stop smoking when they believe that smoking is damaging their health and they want to live a healthier life. Anything short of this and a smoker will probably not abstain from cigarettes for a lifetime.
Why do people commit to things they don’t follow through with?
This is another one of those challenging questions about commitment, follow through, and values. The short answer is: “Because they want to.” People say they want to exercise, they want to quit smoking, they want to lose weight, they want to live more economically. Why? Because most people entertain more than one point-of-view (POV) about themselves and their world. For starters, here is the “ideal POV” and there is the “real POV.” We dream about what we wish we were, ideally. This is an idealistic expressions of one’s core values. We want to be fit, smart, thin (or optimal body weight), happy with ourselves.
Could you imagine how you would feel if you were all these things at once.
Sure, ideally, you might feel content. Right? But, Would this be the case? If you were all these things you’d probably lead a highly regimented life. Exercising every morning (or every other morning for an hour or so), going to your college or community class, counting your calories and regimenting your diet to titrate it to your optimal body weight. Reframing every negative thought into a positive idea or an opportunity-in-the making, you’d cease every negative habit, and on and on. Then, Would you be happy? If happy is being busy and constantly focused and regimented the answer might be yes.
But, what about “ice-cream and cake?” What about self-indulgence? Would all this be gone too? Is there a benefit of slackness in your lifestyle or lifestyle habits? This slackness might occur simply because you feel like you want “choice” once in a while. This is where the topic of personal balance enters in. Other terms arise as well such as managing yourself and your personal POV. This is where the realistic POV enters. Is there a cost if you never give in to this desire to indulge yourself? I’ll discuss the value of indulgence in a later entry, but suffice it to say that reaching the ideal might not be the panacea that some think it would be.
Why is Exercise so hard?
I want to come back to the original question. Why is exercise so hard?
Fact #1: It’s easier to be sedentary than to move or be active.
Fact #2: We engage in what we believe in. We enjoy doing what we “like” to do.
Fact #3: People weigh the costs and benefits of their own actions, people, and things.
Premise 1: Exercise is NOT easy to do.
Premise 2: If you value your health and you believe that activity is central to maintaining your health, it becomes a personal cost-benefit formula. It is hard to exercise (cost), exercise maintains health (benefit). If you truly believe (and value) that it is more beneficial to be healthy than to exert yourself ( “exertion = temporary pain and misery”) for 30 minutes per day then you will likely start an activity program for 30-minutes per day. It comes down to this deep intrapsychic trade-off. Sure, it might get easier walking 30-minutes per day the longer you do it, but it will always require exertion to walk and exertion is costly in terms of pure pleasure.
Every life-time commitment is based on a core value.
To adhere to your core personal values requires personal management of your emotions and behaviors.
If you value something, really value it. Then, certain things just fall into place. I will explain how this works as I add to this entry.
CONTINUING ENTRY 8/13/2022